I want

I was sitting here tonight thinking of all of the things that I want to do and want to get and want to achieve and want to accomplish and want to.... Then I read a blog post of my mothers. A simple post with a few attached letters that she wrote to my brother when he was a boot camp. My mind switched gears all of the sudden to, what about what they (soldiers) want, or what the less fortunate want. I may WANT a lot of things, but what a gift it is to WANT. Rather than NEED. I don't feel like I need much, I have most everything that I would ever need and then some, even if I don't have much, I feel very blessed. But what about those that NEED. Now I am thinking I need to stop for a minute and instead of thinking of what I WANT, I need to think about what others NEED. But I also need to go beyond that and not only think about what others may need, but help them with their needs. I remember when my brother was at war and he sent me a letter and asked me why I didn't write to him that often. My response was that I feared that if I wrote to him it would be admitting to myself that he was really in true danger and that he was really gone. Therefore I continued to deny everything and didn't write. When he finally got home a year and a half later, I asked myself, "why don't we have the same relationship that we had when he left?" Well I realized that it was because I hadn't spoken to him as often as I used to. Where I am going with this is, I decided to make a decision to not write my brother because I didn't want to hurt and feel pain, not at all thinking about the pain and loneliness that he may have been feeling. So I put myself before him and now I am truly sorry for it. I do not have the same relationship that I once had because I missed out on a whole year and a half of time with my brother. I put my wants before someone else's needs. I hope that I can remember this and try and help someone in one way or another every day. Someone once told me that even something as little as a smile or a wave can make someone's day. If that is all I can do for a day then I will at least try to do that. I hope that I haven't bored you all, I just thought I would share a moment with you. I hope you all have a wonderful day! Thanks! :)